{"id":301,"date":"2024-11-21T17:59:36","date_gmt":"2024-11-21T17:59:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/?p=301"},"modified":"2024-11-22T18:49:42","modified_gmt":"2024-11-22T18:49:42","slug":"elrin-daun-and-the-grumbsy-gang-chapter-18-the-tail-of-bobby-mcfarane","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/?p=301","title":{"rendered":"Elrin Daun and the Grumbsy Gang – Chapter 18: The Tail of Bobby McFarane"},"content":{"rendered":"

Previous Chapter<\/a> : Next Chapter<\/a><\/p>\n

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Blank Page Baby<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

And I\u2019ll Write Your Name<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

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As I played to an average sized crowd of the titan\u2019s Trap, I noticed my old buddy Yarrick come strolling in. Which wasn\u2019t normal for him. Next to my normally stealthy ally, was a red scaled lizard man, standing over six feet tall at least. He wore black pants that went just past his knees and nothing else. The usually quiet Yarrick walked right up to us as if being friendly was normal behavior for him, \u201cHey guys, I got a new friend.\u201d He looked up at the red lizard with a weird smile.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cWho is this guy?\u201d Roan asked, stepping into the conversation.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cActually he looks like the lizard folk we fought a while back,\u201d I added. \u201cOnly red.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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Syrielle began drawing her sword.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cGuys this is my new friend Bobby McFarane,\u201d Yarrick informed us as if he was just casually talking and we weren\u2019t threatening anyone.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cWho are you?\u201d Syrielle hadn\u2019t fully drawn her weapon.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI\u2019m a monk who lives over there,\u201d He pointed in a random direction. \u201cI\u2019m looking for help for my community. I have aye\u2026 huh\u2026\u201d The way he spoke made me feel like he was reading off a script. \u201cI have a peace offering and gifts for you.\u201d He pulled out a handful of mushrooms.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI like him,\u201d I announced.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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Nydorri turned to Syrielle, \u201cWe could use those for the garden.\u201d It was at that moment I learned that the two of them were working on a garden together.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Knowing nothing comes free, I asked, \u201cWhat kind of help do you need?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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Bobby again had to think before speaking, \u201cMy village is under attack.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re a six foot tall lizard person and you\u2019re having problems defending your village?\u201d Roan shook his head. \u201cFricken nancy this dragon boy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bobby was unphased by the insult. \u201cYeah my hoblins are going missing.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cMelting?\u201d Roan asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMissing,\u201d Bobby corrected.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat makes more sense.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Personally, I wasn\u2019t a fan of the way he said what he said. \u201cWhy do you have hoblins?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou have hoblins?\u201d Syrielle wasn\u2019t happy either once I pointed it out.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cNow are they your hoblins or just hoblins that you know?\u201d I felt as though my question was making sense to him but just to clarify. \u201cAs in like these are \u2018my\u2019 friends.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI say \u2018my hoblins\u2019 as in \u2018my children,\u2019\u201d He was not ready to answer these questions.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cSo they\u2019re not your slaves,\u201d Syrielle clarified.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cNo not at all,\u201d He assured us.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Trying to understand more thoroughly I continued to question him, \u201cSo you mated with hoblin and made little hoblin people?\u201d I hoped my face didn\u2019t show how ugly I thought those hoblin-dragonborn are.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFiguratively my children,\u201d He clarified.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Blondos put his arm around my shoulder, \u201cThe bard struggles with metaphors, I’ll explain it to him later.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI get it now.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cSo are you their God?\u201d Syrielle asked. \u201cWhat are you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJust a humble monk,\u201d Was the reply.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cYou don\u2019t sound humble,\u201d I countered. \u201cYou just very arrogantly announced ownership over a bunch of hoblin people.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cCan you say a bunch of <\/span>S<\/span><\/i> words for me,\u201d Roan asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cS words,\u201d The dragonborn replied confused as his tongue stuck out of his mouth while he spoke. Roan giggled to himself.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cSo anyways,\u201d Yarrick interjected. \u201cI feel like I\u2019ve been bored for a few days and he has a job for us so why don\u2019t we help the guy out.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cJob as in money,\u201d Roan held up his fingers and rubbed them together.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cUhmm\u2026\u201d Bobby thought for a moment. \u201cI don\u2019t really have money. I\u2019m a monk. I don’t have any ownership over things.\u201d A very straightforward and to the point explanation.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI don\u2019t need the money,\u201d I exclaimed. \u201cI just need the story.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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There was a brief pause as everyone awkwardly stood around not saying much. They clearly weren\u2019t interested in taking another low paying job considering how rich we were returning from Heather\u2019s Keep.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll give you a night of festivities,\u201d He offered.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMake it a week and we got a deal,\u201d Roan declared.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYeah I\u2019ll shake on that.\u201d And they did so, declaring a week long party for us all.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I nodded at our new friend, \u201cHe\u2019s unlike any monk I\u2019ve ever met.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI like to party.\u201d He went on to describe the brewery he owns at his monastery as well as the bavarian style pretzels he and the hoblin people make. He and Roan gambled, the sailor cheated as is classic for him but acquired no money as the dragon man has none. We all bonded over party stories, as he was not quick to share tales of combat.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

His homeland of DaisyField was a very hilly country populated mostly by the tiny folk, but with many wild beasts around. Not to mention neighboring tribes of all kinds in the nearby regions.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He\u2019s had to protect his little tribe for years, but in the last few weeks they\u2019ve been attacked by a sky beast. \u201cUnfortunately, I\u2019m a dragon man. Not a dragon. There\u2019s nothing I can do about an airborne creature. Not alone at least.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo you protect the village from a lot of stuff?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019d be surprised how many wicked folk come looking for trouble around there.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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We were excited to help. At least those of us who could. Zorthos and Nydorri had to stay behind to take care of personal matters. The rest of the Grumbsy Gang was eager. Though, none of us were excited at the idea of the long walk, but Glish was the only one to moan about it. That confused Bobby, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you guys just ride with me? It\u2019ll be faster.\u201d He hopped in the front of a large wagon. At the head of the wagon, was a freaking pink unicorn.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI\u2019ve heard of those,\u201d Glish pointed excitedly. \u201cThat\u2019s a horndog.\u201d He ran up to the unicorn and started petting it like a dog. \u201cGood boy. Good boy.\u201d The mystical creature purred with pure enjoyment.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The dragon man laughed. \u201cHah. Unicorn\u2019s love everything. Anyways. Hop in everybody. We have a long way to go.\u201d He ordered us all to get in the back of his rather large wagon. We did as instructed and blasted off South and a bit to the East.<\/span><\/p>\n

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The car we rode not long ago was the fastest vehicle of my life. This horned pink creature of the heavens brought the same speed in a matter of moments. We were in awe the whole time, and could barely even take in the sights they were going by so quickly. I sang some songs, and we had some laughs. Bobby drank wine the whole way with plenty on the wagon to offer. We passed out not long into the journey.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Eventually, much like the engine of the car we rode nearly a month before, the unicorn did in fact need a break. We rested for a night, in a small town called Cupper\u2019s Hawk. Several dozen houses, and plenty of farms around. A nearby Coal mine kept the village functioning.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Unlike his steed, Bobby didn’t appear to need any rest at all and just kept fricken going with the party. So we all joined him because we are not those that turn down. During a conversation regarding an elaborate scheme to prank King Thraine, I noticed Roan hop to his feet preparing for a fight. There was a bit of a commotion around the bar from his reaction. Several Hyenians were standing in the doorway looking confused and a bit frightened.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe have a problem?\u201d The largest and tallest of them asked us.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t we kill all of you bastards?\u201d Roan asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Syrielle was sitting next to him, having drunk quite a bit more than she usually does. \u201cI don\u2019t think we genocided the hyena people dude. We didn\u2019t even kill 100 of them.\u201d Then her eyes locked right on Yarrick, \u201cDid we?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> He shrugged.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYarrick, how many did you kill?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He shrugged.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhy the fuck are you killing our people?\u201d The same Hyenian asked with great grumpiness. They all looked confused by our behavior. It was hard to read their faces, because they\u2019re hyenas and all, but they seemed genuine. \u201cWhat did we do to you?\u201d The alpha complained. \u201cWe just look like some people you killed so you wanna kill us too?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou shit heads just attacked us randomly on the road fuckwad.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bobby placed a hand on Roan\u2019s shoulder, \u201cPlease friend. There are many who look like this in the land of Kayos. Not all of them are thieves and scoundrels.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The smallest of the hyenians shouted, \u201cHow would you like it if we attacked every human we saw?\u201d The furry bastard took a step forward. \u201cYou think that sounds fun?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“That…” Roan whined, “That’s what I’m complaining about?”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We eventually calmed down and drank on opposite sides of the bar. I got very drunk and found myself stumbling around outside. It\u2019s not that I\u2019m super hazy on the details on how I got out there, it\u2019s that I\u2019m not interested in telling you where I was going or what I was doing.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It almost appeared to be a peaceful night, until I heard sticks cracking around me, and realized I wasn’t actually alone. When I stopped and looked around, there was a little movement in the shadows of the bushes around me.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t have any money if that\u2019s what you want?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The laughter grew louder, and out of the darkness, walked the five hyenians I saw earlier. \u201cWe\u2019re way past money my friend,\u201d The tallest of them explained.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Giggling the loudest, the shortest said, \u201cHow do you think he tastes Trome?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The large one laughed, \u201cLike a bitch?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo bitches taste good?\u201d I was actually curious.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Instead of being creepy, they genuinely laughed. \u201cWe have ourselves a funny one,\u201d Trome taunted as he stepped towards me. \u201cIt\u2019s too bad you run around with such a nasty crew.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry my boy was mean to you earlier.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

At that point he seemed offended. All of them did. Trome angrily growled, \u201cYou think we care about mean words from some turd. We were there that day. We saw what your friends did to our brothers.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I thought for a second, \u201cSo my racist friend was right?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Trome nodded, \u201cThey usually are\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWell I don\u2019t agree with that but the current evidence isn\u2019t in my favor.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

They all laughed again before the alpha declared, \u201cI\u2019d say we\u2019ve let him talk long enough. If we\u2019re gonna pick off the rest of them we should really get moving.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My rapier was out of its sheath in a moment, and pointing at my new foes. But not pointing particularly straight out. I was a bit wobbly at that point in the evening and fairly confident I was going to lose any fight, let alone a five against one. Each of them had me beat one on one unless they were drunk and not better at fighting.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d say it\u2019s time for all of you to understand who it is you are messing with,\u201d My sword raised to my face. After taking a deep breath in I exhaled, \u201cI am Elrin Daun Of Gladland. The Fighting Writer. If you\u2019re ready for your story to end. Make it as glorious as can be.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Trome proudly shook his head. \u201cI frickin love this guy. Maybe he won\u2019t taste like a bitch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Almost disappointed, I had to confirm, \u201cSo bitches don\u2019t taste good?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

From behind me a familiar voice announced, \u201cElrin.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I spun around to find Yarrick standing behind me. Not in the shadows, not using his stealth. Just there. Walking towards him from his left was none other than the dragon man, casually eating meat on a stick. Yarrick pointed at me, tilted his head, and grunted. Bobby nodded back, then marched directly towards me.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Looking around him, to me, Yarrick shouted, \u201cJust come here. Bobby’s got this.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There was no reason not to listen. I walked past Bobby while giving him a quick high five. It made me feel like I had some authority so I could feel good about myself.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Without any descent I stood next to my four foot tall ally. He himself had a devilish smirk as he watched his red scaled friends march towards the enemy with casual confidence.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Trome and the boys didn\u2019t seem worried yet, probably because they never saw Yarrick and don’t realize how bad ass he is. And none of us but Yarrick had ever seen Bobby fight. If ever, because Yarrick said \u201cnew friend\u201d earlier.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Trome took the lead, lashing out with his claws, but was put stiff with literally one left hook. The rest panicked and lunged immediately. Bobby jumped in the air spun around and swung his tail smacking all of them in the face.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

McFarrin then walked back and we both gave him a high give. The hyenians slowly began to regain their wits as one of them asked, \u201cWhat hell happened? What the hell hit me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

With a chuckle I explained, \u201cThe tail of Bobby McFarren.\u201d Then I imitated the whack with my own hand on my face. \u201cDown in one shot.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Another began to wake up much quicker, but found a dagger pointed at his throat. Yarrick removed his hood and smiled. \u201cWe\u2019re not in the business of genocide. But we\u2019re also not in the business of stupid. You come at any of us again\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He took a pause and for some reason I finished for him, \u201cWe\u2019ll end your whole line.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> Trome was starting to wake up, but Bobby placed a foot on his chest. \u201cWe\u2019re gonna sleep in town tonight. You and your friends are gonna sleep somewhere else. Or\u2026 I\u2019m tossing you in jail. Or\u2026\u201d He pointed at Yarrick who still held a dagger near the throat of the scared hyenian. \u201cHe\u2019ll kill you. Painfully.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The alpha nodded. We allowed them to collect each other and scatter out of town. There was no reason not to believe they would come back after we spared their lives. Also just the fucking ass whooping they received.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Realizing I wouldn\u2019t be able to top something like that for the evening I went to bed. We were up at the crack of dawn and on the road once more. The Unicorn had fully rested through the night and blasted off at full speed.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

By the end of the day we found ourselves at a massive grassy hill. We hopped out of the wagon, Bobby unhooked the Unicorn, and we left the vehicle behind. Our new dragon friend led us up stone steps, towards a small building at the top of the hill. \u201cWelcome to the monastery\u2026\u201d He opened his arms up for us to walk right into a large temple filled with tiny little people.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was nice and smelled yeasty. There were 3 human monks, and 19 halfflin refugees.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOh Bobby! you\u2019re back!” yelled a short busty hafflin. \u201cBobby\u2019s here. Bring him out.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A couple more hafflins came running out carrying another who was bleeding from the stomach. Roan quickly grabbed his left glove, but Yarrick advised him there was no need. The dragon man\u2019s tail began to glow at the tip. Brighter and brighter as he walked towards his little hobblin \u201cchildren.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He placed the long illuminated end of his spine onto the little one\u2019s stomach, and a moment later the small man was fine. About as fast as Roan\u2019s hand or any of Nydorri\u2019s berries.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat happened?” Bobby asked the little one before he asked if he was okay.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJust some bandits\u2026\u201d The hafflin hopped to his feet. \u201cThey heard you skipped town so they decided to bother us.\u201d He scrunched his fist. \u201cI got a couple of good licks in. They weren\u2019t too tough. But I gotta practice more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The busty hafflin that first saw us tapped Bobby on the elbow. \u201cMr. McFarrin.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cClaire?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWho are these friends of yours?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOh\u2026\u201d he just remembered he didn\u2019t introduce us. \u201cThese are adventurers I found quite a bit to the North in a town called Grumbsy. They\u2019re here to hunt the sky beast.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

She checked us out. \u201cOkay they look,\u201d There was a suspicious pause. \u201cCompetent.\u201d It was clear she did not think we looked competent. \u201cAre you guys here to help us?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> It was confusing why she asked, considering he just told her that\u2019s why we were there, but we reassured her that was indeed what we were going to do. The Dragon Fellow requested some wine for us and two large casks were brought out for us to destroy our bodies on.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

After putting ourselves unconscious once again. We woke up to the most delicious pancakes we\u2019d ever tasted. I hardly remembered any of the details from the night before, so I had to ask again.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s the plan to hunt this thing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A tiny man near me announced, \u201cThe beast lives on Mount Gormund.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> \u201cWhat\u2019s your name, little one?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> Very angrily he replied, \u201cMy name is Brandon and if you ask again I swear to Dionysus.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSorry Brendan,\u201d I fucked it up immediately.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m gonna kick this shit head\u2019s ass\u201d The hafflin lunged up from his seat but his friends hopped on him dragging him back down.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Glish of course shouted, \u201cKick his ass kick his ass.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> \u201cDude what the hell?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? I\u2019m on your team you weenie,\u201d The blacksmith complained. \u201cDo you want me to pick his side just because I\u2019m one of them?\u201d Sitting next to him was Vergusson, who promptly crossed his arms and shook his head at me with grave disappointment.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bobby came running to the table, \u201cOkay calm down calm down. What\u2019s going on?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> \u201cThis guy keeps disrespecting my name?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve had a lot of alcohol.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBrandon\u201d Bobby snapped, \u201cYou know these people can\u2019t hold their liquor. We\u2019re gonna go kill the flying thing soon and I need them. So go sit in the corner.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> While he was very grumpy, the tiny man got up and walked away.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bobby looked at me. \u201cI apologize for him. He doesn\u2019t realize how drunk you are.\u201d <\/span>I really wasn\u2019t that drunk at that point in the conversation.<\/span><\/i> \u201cAnyways. It\u2019s time to sober up and get moving. Mt. Gormund isn\u2019t far. We should head out in the morning.\u201d We drank a little water, hopped on the wagon after he reattached the unicorn, and a moment later we were there. As we inspected the base for the best route Vergusson advised that we all look up. Flying through the clouds in an upward trajectory towards the top of the mountain, was a giant winged beast. It was bright yellow in color, with a long tail. I couldn\u2019t make out too many other details from where I was but I can tell you it was terrifying. From where I stood I was guessing it could eat a horse.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We gazed upwards in awe for a moment trying to figure out what the proper move was.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019d say we look for its nest,\u201d Glish suggested.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Roan pointed in the direction from which the creature had emerged, \u201cWe got an idea of where it came from, we saw it fly that way.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The blacksmith nodded to the sailor, “Let’s see if it has eggs.”<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“Let’s smash the eggs and make it angry,” Verg brandished his shiny new maul.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“What if we took all the eggs and raised them?” Glish suggested. “And then come back.”<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Genuinely contemplating his idea I said, \u201cIt doesn’t solve the current problem but it does help Zorthos’s circus idea and that should really just become the priority from now on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The tiny man pointed to me proudly.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As we sat there for a moment trying to think of a plan, we noticed Vergusson began climbing. Bobby pointed to our right and said, \u201cThere\u2019s a mountain pass we could walk up dude?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> Verg looked down and shrugged.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The rest of us walked up the mountain pass, while our half-orc doofus climbed. He eventually reached the path on the other end and waited for us to circle around to him. Only to start climbing again rather than joining us.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We made it most of the way without having to climb at all, but sooner or later we were forced to. At which point Vergusson started complaining about having to climb.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We were pretty sure the nest was 2\/3rds the way up the mountain. After discussing the situation, we decided the best idea was to hide for right now, and then try climbing the mountain at night. It was not wise to climb during the day.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Right around dusk, we saw the creature flying back home. We all jumped into the bushes to hide. I found myself with a nice clear view of it soaring along. It screeched loudly and was obviously glaring down upon us. Due to their being a head sticking out of the bushes. <\/span>Fucking Vergusson.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It swooped in to attack us.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t want to reveal my position, assuming all it saw was the dumb half-orc literally sticking his head out of the leaves. Through the brush, I swiftly moved forward, away from my pack of allies, remaining unseen. I figured we would work best spread out. <\/span>I\u2019m definitely not being a pussy or anything.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My eyes couldn\u2019t spot all of my well hidden allies, but I could hear them moving and scattering through the woods as well. Verg didn\u2019t appear to give a fuck, standing there with his great ax.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The ferocious beast swooped down, digging the claws of its legs into the barbarian\u2019s chest. Massive wings each as wide as a wagon swatted hard at the ground sending both of them in the air. Verg roared until a stinger came from underneath and pierced him in the back. Then he choked out blood.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He still managed to unleash a devastating blow with his ax connecting clean to the chest. The wyvern growled in pain lifting him in the air. He swung again hitting the beast so hard it\u2019s grip released. The half-orc hit the mountain hard. Based on the way he puked black blood he was not getting up any time soon.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I sprinted over to check on him. When I knelt down all he did was point behind me. The winged monster was circling straight back for us. I prepared my bow, knowing there was no way I\u2019d carry my ally out of the way.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cGo!\u201d Verg choked out, but I wasn\u2019t gonna fucking do that.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cShut up bitch, I\u2019m dying with ya.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It came at me so fast I barely had time to think. I could have blasted Syrielle in the back of the head if I wasn\u2019t careful. She slipped in front of me just before the creature came to us. Her katana cut the claw to our left causing a squeal. It quickly snapped its tail at her, but she deflected it with insane reflexes.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Our foe rolled on the ground, and I took my chance to fire. Both my arrows stuck in its side far easier than most large creatures I\u2019ve fought. It locked eyes on me. \u201cFuck.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> From multiple directions in the woods more arrows came at the wyvern. It stuttered and skipped to fly away as Syrielle chased it down. With its eyes on her the beast didn\u2019t see Bobby attack with a knee straight to the skull just as it left the ground. The attack sent it spinning through the air crashing into multiple trees, rolling through and taking down some more. Syrielle ended her charge admiring his work.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThis dude got this?\u201d She walked slowly towards them. Wondering what her next move should be. The wyvern whipped its tail at Bobby, smacking him away. The samurai restarted her charge. That\u2019s when I realized our enemy was not alone.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Straight from behind her a baby wyvern, barely larger than an eagle, dug its claws into her back. It must have been an infant. A tiny stinger stabbed her twice before my arrow poked it off her.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A third yellow winged beast landed on the ground in front of her. This one was the size of a cow. Probably an adolescent. It\u2019s tail poked her in the gut before she could react. It shot the same attack again and she removed the end of the tail. The middle sized wyvern backed away, but when she dropped to a knee it awkwardly lunged again.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I charged in with my rapier, but I wasn\u2019t going to make it in time. It extended its neck to bite, but a thin tree fell right on its neck pinning it to the ground. Yarrick came sprinting along the log from the stump end, stabbing our young enemy in the head with a dagger.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But neither of us was paying attention to the baby I shot off Syrielle earlier. It had regained flight, circled back around and tackled Yarrick right off its older sibling. The stinger poked him several times before I stabbed it through the abdomen with my rapier. The baby creature squealed and died. It was actually kinda sad, I didn\u2019t feel good at all.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My tiny friend choked up blood.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo you still have that magic spear?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI already used it today?\u201d He pulled his hood off, revealing a large burn mark on his neck that wasn’t there this morning.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“It’s power can’t be used twice in one day.”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“That doesn’t answer my question.”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He passed out.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I tucked him under some roots that he could fit under and returned to the battle. I saw Roan stumbling towards a tree near where Glish was firing his crossbow. The large beast was constrained in a large net.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The crude sailor smacked me on the chest to get my attention. \u201cThat\u2019s not gonna hold?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWho brought a net?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> \u201cI did,\u201d He reloaded his harpoon. \u201cI got tricks.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As he fired it the wyvern finally managed to rip itself out of its confines. With a loud screech it took a harpoon to the throat and a few arrows to the chest. And I was not happy at all with any of that.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It flew into the air and we all scattered. I dove under some massive roots I found. It provided good cover for me to examine the sky. While I heard the beast fly above me, I couldn\u2019t even see it through the trees I had found cover under. As I scurried around I found a cave. Perhaps too small for the wyvern.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYo you fucking twat where you at?\u201d The hafflin shouted. \u201cCome on you big fart nugget what you are crying about? Because we killed your babies? Wah wah.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> I wanted to point out that now was not the time to demonize me nor to empathize with the wyvern. But that\u2019s the douchebag\u2019s style.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The hafflin was standing in a clearing. Roan was in a tree nearby. Bobby was between two rocks. They clearly had some sort of strategy afoot, but nobody told me about it. So I crouched where I was, hoping not to get in the way of their awesome plan.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

That\u2019s when I heard the branches above me crack and break loudly. As the leaves and trees above exploded I rolled away successfully dodging the descending attack. The loud screech of the Wyvern let me know it was whining that it missed me.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Like a bitch.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The tail whipped around some trees, but it was too awkward in these tight quarters allowing me to dodge. Before the sky based monster could readjust and murder me, a harpoon scraped its neck. \u201cRUN!\u201d Roan shouted.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Not that he needed to say that because I was already running. But I certainly needed the spear. I wasn\u2019t faster, but I didn\u2019t have to squeeze through the trees like the beast chasing me. The cave wasn\u2019t far. Once I entered I realized it also wasn\u2019t that deep. Before the wyvern followed me in, I saw Bobby leap at it once more. It reacted with a whack of its tail.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t see him land, but I heard him crash into the mountainside near the cave wall. Ignoring him, it crawled right towards me. For some reason, it was mad at me in particular. Probably because I killed the baby. I crept backwards, sword drawn trying to think of my next move.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The wyvern stepped into the cave, with no trees in the way, it stalked swiftly towards me. Its eyes were black pearls in the middle of a golden face. Its head was almost that of a frog with the exception of its long bird-like beak, filled with the jaws of a shark.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My back hit the cave wall. I didn\u2019t plan very well.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Thankfully it didn\u2019t even make it half way down the tunnel when it screeched in pain. It\u2019s head slid along the wall backwards while its whole body spun around. When its tail made it all the way back it whipped out at me revealing the stinger had been removed. \u201cHide!\u201d Roan shouted into the cave. Blood splattered out of the end of its now incomplete tail.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The flying monster chased my savior into the woods where it dove towards him. Glish was there firing his crossbow, nailing every shot. While the Wyvern began to slither through the trees again, Bobby dashed after it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I gave chase as well.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Roan screamed in pain as I heard the growling of an animal gnawing into its prey. Then I heard him laugh, \u201cIs that all you got? Fuck! That was rhetorical.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

From where I was I couldn\u2019t see Bobby engage, but the Dragon man and the Wyvern went toe to toe for a few seconds before Glish and I got there. He had the large beast on the back foot, but then it leapt on him. Its claws couldn\u2019t squeeze into his scales, but as it flapped its wings and slowly lifted off I realized it could drop him from a massive height.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I dove towards the monster. My sword just barely grazed the beast’s wing. Just enough to stumble it back to the ground. Its head swung, smacking my whole body\u00a0 into a tree. After landing I noticed Glish had climbed up its back stabbing the same wing I attacked towards the base of the spine.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It flapped anyways and the little man just barely gripped on for dear life. The wyvern released Bobby and angrily flapped about to get the little bug off of it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Glish continued stabbing. Letting out a screech, the creature rolled over, crushing the hafflin. He whined, letting me know he lived. But he wasn\u2019t gonna move for a while.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The wyvern dashed away on foot and after some momentum just barely managed to lift itself off the ground. Its flight was very awkward, the beast was titling weirdly. It circled around landing not far from us.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Its flying attacks were over for now.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bobby was back to his feet, seemingly unfazed from the claws that tore into my half-orc friend. The dragon-like creature stared directly at the dragon-like man. Bobby\u2019s hands slowly started to glow much like his tail did before. The wyvern roared with rage without any magic, but it was much bigger Neither had a strategy on their mind. They simply charged. I wanted to join in, <\/span>but what was I going to do?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The first few punches knocked the wyvern flying backwards. But a moment after Bobby was breathing heavily and his fists were no longer glowing. He quickly lunged again before it regained its composure and landed a huge kick.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Before he landed it whacked its tail around at him. He hit a tree hard and it jumped on him, but he landed an uppercut to back it off. Then he dodged the next tail attack, and landed more strikes of his own. Being the faster and smarter fighter he figured out his opponents patterns much quicker.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But it changed its patterns quickly and started clawing him again. He stopped head hunting and began attacking its legs, only to get caught in its jaws. Bobby relentlessly elbowed the outside of its mouth.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Realizing it couldn\u2019t bite into him, the beast leapt high into the air using only it’s powerful legs to jump and then whipped him at the ground. Before he got to his feet it landed right on top of him. The wyvern rolled off, only to receive an arrow to the throat. I tucked behind a tree and thankfully it blasted right past me looking for the archer.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I dashed over to check Bobby. I couldn’t feel a pulse, not through the scales. But he was breathing. And groaning. And whining. \u201cFuck that hurts.\u201d He spat up blood then asked me to get off him.<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> Loud crunching of sticks and screeching let me know that was still coming for me. I sidestepped hoping to lead it away from him. As the last of my team I had no idea what I was going to do.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I screamed, giving the creature a target to chase away from Bobby. When it charged me I hopped behind a tree. It awkwardly stuck its head around giving me the chance to poke it. My attack was not fun for my opponent, but I enjoyed it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Using high level fancy footwork, I stepped around another tree. The wyvern\u2019s long neck stuck around again trying to get to me only to meet a similar fate. We did it yet again, only for the same thing to happen.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I began to giggle wondering if I was going to defeat the creature myself. On the fourth attempt, right as I poked the face, its tail whipped around and smacked me in the back. My head slammed into the tree.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Fierce jaws collided with the bark as I dove on the ground to dodge. As I hopped to my feet the large incomplete tail damn near knocked me unconscious. A blurry world informed me the wyvern\u2019s face was getting closer to mine.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Slowly sticking its head around the tree, saliva poured from its teeth as the beast prepared to consume me. For some reason, despite being a badass so many times before, this time I closed my eyes. I was just tired, exhausted and scared. What was I going to haunt this time? The beast won. Nature won. I was done.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I heard it squeal. Blood curdling.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When I opened my eyes. The wyvern’s head dropped in the dirt in front of me, rolling disconnected from it’s body. I could see the bloody insides of its spine before the whole beast collapsed to the ground. Syrielle was standing the monster holding her katana down with both hands breathing very heavily.<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span> \u201cNeed a\u2026\u201d She coughed up black blood and then fell to the ground.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As I finished her sentence I grabbed her, \u201chand.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

She smiled then continued to vomit blackness.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Her body began to convulse, and without help she was going to die in a matter of seconds. But the moment I frantically looked around for help, I noticed Bobby was right at her side, with a tail glowing gold.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Previous Chapter<\/a> : Next Chapter<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Previous Chapter : Next Chapter   Blank Page Baby And I\u2019ll Write Your Name   As I played to an average sized crowd of the titan\u2019s Trap, I noticed my old buddy Yarrick come strolling in. Which wasn\u2019t normal for him. Next to my normally stealthy ally, was a red scaled lizard man, standing over […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-301","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/301","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=301"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/301\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":324,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/301\/revisions\/324"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=301"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=301"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/deficientlyattentive.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=301"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}